Dad died 7 years ago today. Rather than say something like, "I miss him," which is both wholly accurate and totally inadequate, I decided to try to encapsulate one little specific thing I miss.
In 2012 I made my triumphant return to Huntington. Ok, in reality I was running from a bad work situation and a worse life situation. Because of some confusion about how quickly Human Resources works, I ended up "temporarily" moving in with my dad, where I stayed for the better part of the next 5 years. What started as a genuine financial need turned into a symbiotic relationship and a wonderful friendship.
So the thing I miss, not more than anything else, but persistently over the years, is watching ball. I can close my eyes and put him in his chair and me in my spot on the couch and watch "the game." On a great night, it was a competitive basketball game. But because we still had cable, I watched a ton of Cincinnati Reds and Pittsburgh Pirates games over the course of those Summers. And those nights were also really good. And like truly good friends, we sometimes talked over the game about current events or life philosophy, and we sometimes said nothing for long stretches with no need to fill the silence. And plenty of times we talked ball. I can't say today that I took those nights for granted, because I think we both really cherished those years together, knowing that not many fathers and sons get that kind of time together. But man would I love one more.
Earlier this week, Miles grabbed one of my hats on the way outside for a walk. It was a Charlotte Hornets hat. I don't care one bit about the Hornets, but I bought the hat on a trip dad and I took for one night, just to go see a random NBA game. We stopped on the way down at a really good BBQ spot in Asheville, went to the game that night, and drove home the next morning. I'm really glad I bought that hat, and that Miles grabbed it. Because as much as I'm looking backwards, I'm also looking forward with him. I'm not trying to recreate what my dad and I have, but I do want to make sure the relationship is special. And with any luck at all, will involve talking a little ball.
